There is so much choice and it can get overwhelming. A lot of it does come down to cost and also what you'll make the most of.
I've stayed in all 3 hotels you're considering. The biggest difference to me is the breakfast, my hubby wants a big cooked breakfast so we have been at the New York the last few years. He then eats enough to go without lunch, but that doesn't work for me and my daughter so we'd be happy in any of them. Location - all 3 are around the lake and not an awful lot in distance. Theming, again not sure a 3 yr old really notices too much so depends on you. In some hotels the bed layout is a factor i.e Cheyenne popular for families as only one with bunk beds.
Go out of holiday time while you can with a 3 yr old! we loved May, went for my birthday 2nd May and the weather was mild (still needed coats in the evening) but we loved the park being open till 10pm and even though DD was only 4 she stayed up too.
Meal plan - I have and I haven't. This year we decided against it as wasn't sure we'll get our moneys worth and taking a 22mth old not convinced sitting down for meals is going to always work. Normally I know exactly where I'm going each night and pretty much during day too so will be a change for me as I expect we'l mostly use counter service and places in the village (we have Inventions and Planet Hollywood booked). The meal vouchers do give a saving but I don't think it's enough to make it a must have. we found we were hungry in the day so still spent money and then went out for meals that we didn't really need.
I think have a look at the different prices for different days (have you got the calendar that shows peak days etc as you could pick the value days knowing it should be quieter) and now we have the added confusion of all the different countries offers as can book them through a crossover deal.
Mostly, just enjoy planning!